"Inside The walls"

I have begun working on my second book (again).  When I had finished the first book I thought I was done and could begin working on a fiction novel I have been wanting to write.  Well, that wasn't going to happen.  After many reviews and talks with some of my readers and friends, I need to write another "Life Without Parole" and go even deeper.

Since writing the first one I had thought I would be good to go on the second and have it knocked out in no time.  Little did I know I would be sitting and staring at a blank screen for a long time.  As I commented to a friend, "I was having a stare down with the computer screen and the computer screen won."

With my life all laid out and written down, you would think I could just go at it and write like crazy.  But I am having difficulty finding the right words.  Strange thing to happen when writing on a subject you know so well.  I am taking most of what I have already written in the first book.  But I am adding quite a bit. So I am still wondering what is with the wall in front of me.  Many times I sit and try to write and just find nothing is coming out.  I know what I want to write and I know how I want to say it.  So where the hell is it?

I've lived my nightmares over again to write about them.  I'm thinking those same nightmares are playing with my head.

I have received more information from family and friends about my past and growing up.  I've even learned more about one side of the family that I had assumed was fairly normal.  Or should I say as normal as normal could be.  Dysfunctional seems to be the common thread throughout my life.

I also have to say that writing the first book has been quite the blessing.  I have seen more good come out of writing that book than I could have even imagined.  To be honest, my fear was that it would anger people the wrong way and separate me from other family.  I even prepared mys elf to ostracized from some circles.  But it has been the complete opposite.  I think I underestimated people and learned that not everyone is a monster or wants to ruin your life.

I'm moving forward and will be completing this book by summer.  Look for t and buy it.  You really don't want to miss this one!


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