Everyone has something they look to for comfort. We all have a secret that we keep that no one knows. When we were children we had teddy bears, puppies, kittens, dolls, blankets and pillows to keep us company, or to keep us warm in bed at night. As a victim of abuse I had a small teddy bear. This bear was by my side in bed every night. It the was the only thing in my world that did not hurt me and would never leave me. Every night when I was able to sleep, I would grab my teddy bear and give a deep sigh and fall asleep. It was my comfort.
As an adult I would be compelled to ask if anyone still has a teddy bear they keep on the bed. Do any survivors of abuse still have that one thing that brings that big "sigh" when they hold it, see it or hear it? Although being well adjusted, content, coping, gotten over it, moved on, or maintaining, we still need something to give us that big "sigh".
Young, middle aged, or into our golden years, we need our comforts, safe place, and our escapes. Many I have talked to say they find that big "sigh" when they see their child walk off the school bus, see their spouse walk through the door, or see their dog running to greet them. Some have found, as I mentioned, a teddy bear, blanket and the like have been what they need for that comfort and or escape. No matter the insignificance to others and how oblivious they are to what we see as a comfort, it is our own safe place when we need it.
I have found my comfort in a few things withing my world. I have this furry little squeaky thing that runs around my house. She makes noises and sometimes gets into trouble. She is an eleven pound hug bug. But when the time comes for just needing a sloppy wet kiss from here or just laying next to me, she is there. I also have, most importantly, the most patient, understanding, and tolerant wife there ever could be.
Find your "sigh". Go forth and hug that teddy bear, wrap yourself in that blanket, bear hug that spouse or squeeze that child until they complain you're hurting them. They will understand one day
What is your big "sigh"?
As an adult I would be compelled to ask if anyone still has a teddy bear they keep on the bed. Do any survivors of abuse still have that one thing that brings that big "sigh" when they hold it, see it or hear it? Although being well adjusted, content, coping, gotten over it, moved on, or maintaining, we still need something to give us that big "sigh".
I have found my comfort in a few things withing my world. I have this furry little squeaky thing that runs around my house. She makes noises and sometimes gets into trouble. She is an eleven pound hug bug. But when the time comes for just needing a sloppy wet kiss from here or just laying next to me, she is there. I also have, most importantly, the most patient, understanding, and tolerant wife there ever could be.
Find your "sigh". Go forth and hug that teddy bear, wrap yourself in that blanket, bear hug that spouse or squeeze that child until they complain you're hurting them. They will understand one day
What is your big "sigh"?
Words to live by. You have such a way to help us all to understand.
ReplyDeleteMy big sigh is my little girl. No matter what's got me down, a hug from her puts everything back into perspective.
ReplyDeleteWe just had our first granddaughter and all of what I felt when I had my children came back. I now have a new "big sigh" to go along with the rest.
DeleteI'm still trying to find my "big sigh" but I'm getting there! Having new, good friends helps! Great post John!
ReplyDelete