One of the greatest events of my life was when my wife came in to my life. If it were not for her, I would not have made it.
Having someone to support your journey is extremely important. Once you've gotten away from the abuser and are now taking that long road to getting your life back, you need someone to help hold your hand now and then. Like I have said in the book, you cannot do it alone. As much as you and or I might think we can or could have, it is not going to happen.
So many times I felt as though having some sort of a normal life was out of the question. But I also knew I had someone who understood and would help put the band-aids on when I needed them. Even though I had not made any serious attempts at facing my problems, and did not tell my wife about most of them until we had been married for so many years, it was essential to reach out and take a hand for support.
We've also been fortunate enough that in this day and age there are so many groups that we can turn to for help. Both men and women are only a phone call, email or open door away from help.
Recovering from an abusive relationship, childhood abuse, or even a single event brings it's own unique challenges. So with those challenges we must always focus on where we want to be. Remember, a life lived in the past will always be repeated. We all know that if we feel like a victim, look like a victim and act like a victim, we will always be treated like a victim. I will not be treated like a victim. Yes, I am a victim, but I will not live like one, act like one or look like one. That life is over and gone. I spent many years being victimized over and over again by people, and they never knew they were doing it. I know it takes years to come out of that iron shell we build around ourselves, but when we finally break free of it, the rewards are endless. Not everyone wants to hurt us, sexually assault us, rape us, abuse us, or mentally abuse us. We need to open that shell just a little bit more each time to see that there is another world that we can live in where we are not someones victim.
Having someone to support your journey is extremely important. Once you've gotten away from the abuser and are now taking that long road to getting your life back, you need someone to help hold your hand now and then. Like I have said in the book, you cannot do it alone. As much as you and or I might think we can or could have, it is not going to happen.
So many times I felt as though having some sort of a normal life was out of the question. But I also knew I had someone who understood and would help put the band-aids on when I needed them. Even though I had not made any serious attempts at facing my problems, and did not tell my wife about most of them until we had been married for so many years, it was essential to reach out and take a hand for support.
We've also been fortunate enough that in this day and age there are so many groups that we can turn to for help. Both men and women are only a phone call, email or open door away from help.
Recovering from an abusive relationship, childhood abuse, or even a single event brings it's own unique challenges. So with those challenges we must always focus on where we want to be. Remember, a life lived in the past will always be repeated. We all know that if we feel like a victim, look like a victim and act like a victim, we will always be treated like a victim. I will not be treated like a victim. Yes, I am a victim, but I will not live like one, act like one or look like one. That life is over and gone. I spent many years being victimized over and over again by people, and they never knew they were doing it. I know it takes years to come out of that iron shell we build around ourselves, but when we finally break free of it, the rewards are endless. Not everyone wants to hurt us, sexually assault us, rape us, abuse us, or mentally abuse us. We need to open that shell just a little bit more each time to see that there is another world that we can live in where we are not someones victim.
Your words speak volumes.
ReplyDeleteThank you